Monday, 9 April 2018

Piles and Piles


Hello my dear Myfanwy

Well I must admit the salad spinner is possibly not the best idea. I’d hate to think of dribbles from soggy knickers ending up in someone’s cocktail!! Oh dear, perish the thought. As always, you set me straight!

Just back from our break and the weather hasn’t been good. But hey-ho we live in England and nothing is ever straight forward. One can’t book the weather - I’ve tried on many occasion but can’t find anyone who wants to take my booking. I best keep looking, one day I’ll find someone, to be sure.

I see you managed to get yourself soaked. Well you did always enjoy a good old wet t-shirt party when you were in your youth. Mind you, don’t think much has changed - pretending to take an umbrella that wasn’t broken, well heard everything now (hahaha).

About your coat! You need to read the instructions when you buy such items, mist proof does not cut waterproof. Take me with you next time, I like a good old examination.

Talking of which, I had to visit the doc this week. Piles …. hum yes bloody piles. Talk about teeth marks on the toilet seat … my dentures are still attached to it. Oh my flaming God and all creation, I wouldn’t wish these on my worst enemy. So off I trot to the doc and had to have them looked at. Oh my word, these doctors are not only getting younger but even more handsome. The one I saw was fresh out of nappies, and yes I had to bare it all!

Oh lord, not a pretty sight I have to say, and the way they get you to twist your legs about well I’m a contortionist now. I think I could meet myself coming backwards!

You will be pleased to know I got some ointment, a bit tricky putting it on but I’ll get the hang of it I’m sure. Well I guess this got a bit too explicit but one likes a good old rummage round in the nether regions, especially when it’s a good looking chap - one can only dream!

Well, time to make dinner. Hummmmm, don’t feel like much after talking about me nether regions!

Speak soon you old bugger – missing you heaps. Must have a date day soon.

Yours always and suffering
Morwenna x


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